Divorced? Wanna make frandship?

Divorceddoodling has a facebook page. Perhaps you are already friends with divorced, or you’ve become a fan.

There has recently been a long gap in divorced doodling’s internet presence – because she was busy with ‘other things.’ That’s beside the point.

When divorced went back to the facebook page she was intrigued to find many messages waiting for her.  Quickly, she read through them, sure that they were full of nuggets of wisdom regarding divorce, or much painful sharing about the process.

Nothing doing.

Not one.

Each message was about ‘frandship’. Allllll of them read something like this ‘send me your email id’, ‘ I am well settled and single’, ‘ Are you male or female?’ ‘ Check out my special collection of VERY private pictures’ – you get the drift?

All the men, yes, they were all men…all the Indian men, and yes again, they were all Indian men (with one exception) had made the erroneous assumption that divorce and dating are interchangeable terms. You are divorced, ergo you must be looking for a partner. How simple. Right? There couldn’t be anything else that you could possibly want.

Why, when I am writing about a serious subject like divorce would I be bombarded by a host of sex hungry perverts who think that a divorced woman is the answer to their wet dreams. Frustrated people who have no idea how to start or sustain a relationship use the anonymity of the internet to stalk and harass women who they think are potential recipients of their spurious fantasies. UGHHHHHH.

This is the reality of life in India for a divorced woman. Divorce IS synonymous with dating, or rather dating is another name for free and dirty sex.

Poor souls, poor uneducated, shallow, disrespectful souls.

What do you have to say, dear reader? Have you suffered in a similar fashion? Do you have strong opinions about this? Please share. And become a fan on the facebook page. Best way to beat the sex-on-the-brain people who think that this is what this blog is about. Its not pornography – its divorce.




About Kalpana

Trying to change the world one blog post at a time. I write. It's the best thing I can do. I am the Hanged Man, the Fool, the sometime Magician. Whether I travel in my imagination or in real life I write about it and show you pictures either through my photography or through the pictures I paint with my words. I read books and write fiction. During working hours I teach English as an Additional Language. I edit.

Posted on June 7, 2011, in abuse, Divorce, Sex stalkers and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. Hasn’t happened to DG may be coz’ she doesn’t have a personal FB page or GGTS FB page is too direct. May be her muscles have started showing 🙂

    Yes, a kid (19 year old) on GGTS FB did try to mess with her but got good in the face.
    It is amusing how from a 17yr old to a 70yr old male on FB has interested in “women” in their interest section but the sad part is women are not interested in them. You were right in saying they are under impression they are the God’s gift to women kind.


    If you don’t look like an uncle just offer the other person how many sit ups they can do in a minute or what is their best time for a 2 mile believe DG they’ll leave you alone.

    Desi Girl

    • Maybe DG, maybe your muscle is showing. Absolutely 🙂
      Yes well, they need to be given it good when they try to mess around without any encouragement. That is the problem, that they cannot read the signs, or they don’t want to.

    • Rajshekhar Malaviya

      Nice suggestion DG, I shall surely try that next time around.

  2. Fabulous post from you yet again. Hats off to you.
    But my dear it is not just divorced women, who get Franship offers from perverts.
    Even married women do. And you know that. You said rightly in your post- ALL THE MEN……

    • Very true Kiran – as you shared, unwanted Frandship offers are a dime a dozen for women, married or unmarried – all are considered fair game. Perhaps we just have to be more fierce and make it clear from our stance that we are NOT INTERESTED. Even before they attempt to reach out.

      • Hey some men do not ever get the message, even if you say it LOUD and CLEAR on their face. They would still give it a try.
        So Stance does not matter.

  3. The perils of being divorced Rajshekhar ? Yes, it makes one’s blood boil. Thanks for that valuable sharing. Divorced people are not ready to jump into a relationship, not ready at all. Which is what my next blog post is about. Working on it…

  4. Rajshekhar Malaviya

    If there are sexual perverts stalking divorced women, there are helpful aunties at hand for the divorced man. The pattern is predictable; invitation for dinner where the prospect (a woman) is present. Uncomfortable for the man, probably humiliating for the woman. They probably don’t understand that in many cases, the divorced man is also wary of starting a relationship, scared even. Is not very upbeat about being directed towards another relationship. I don’t know why the aunties (and in some cases uncles, or friends’ wives, or sisters in laws…) can’t leave the divorced man to find his way on his own, even if he has to stumble and fall; ask me, I prefer it that way.

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